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		<title>How do I dress for court?</title>
		<link>https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2022/06/21/how-do-i-dress-for-court/</link>
		
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		<pubDate>Tue, 21 Jun 2022 13:00:00 +0000</pubDate>
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					<description><![CDATA[<p>One of the most common questions we get from clients is how to dress for any of the particular types of proceedings that they may encounter during a divorce or family court case. A few examples are covered below, including how to dress for going to the family courtroom, in addition to picking out your [&#8230;]</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2022/06/21/how-do-i-dress-for-court/">How do I dress for court?</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
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<p>One of the most common questions we get from clients is how to dress for any of the particular types of proceedings that they may encounter during a divorce or family court case. A few examples are covered below, including how to dress for going to the family courtroom, in addition to picking out your wardrobe for appearing at a mediation or deposition.</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading">How To Dress For Family Court</h2>



<p>If you have a hearing or motion in family court, you will be generally be appearing in a courtroom with the judge, the judge’s staff, a bailiff, other attorneys and other parties. It goes without saying that it is important for you to make the right impression as this is generally the most formal place that you will be appearing throughout your divorce or custody case.</p>



<p>Business professional, and possibly business casual, are the recommended choices of attire in family court. Many men choose to wear a suit, while women may wear. We advise our clients to dress naturally given their profession, so a pair of khakis and polo shirt may be appropriate. We have also had military clients appear in their uniform. However, you need to discuss with your attorney what your divorce judge prefers, as some courts have stricter dress codes than others.</p>



<p>Don’t overdo it. You may give off the impression that you are trying to overcompensate for some shortcoming in your case if you come dressed in a tuxedo or three piece suit. Furthermore, it may be harder to explain to the judge while you shouldn’t pay top dollar maintenance/alimony or child support if your wardrobe (or at least what you show on the day of court) is of the highest caliber.</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading">How To Dress For Mediation</h2>



<p>Mediation is a more relaxed venue than court, as this session devoted to settling your case generally occurs at one of the attorneys’ offices. Usually each party is in a separate conference with his or her attorney, and the mediator goes back and forth while working on a deal.</p>



<p>Business casual is generally appropriate for a mediation, although given the season and the circumstances, such as the accommodations of the building where the mediation is being held, more casual attire may be acceptable. Mediations are generally scheduled for half a day or a full day, with a possible break for lunch, so taking layers and settling in for the long haul may be an appropriate strategy. Again, discuss the specifics with your divorce attorney so you can get specific advice about the peculiars of the mediator and the office where you are mediating.</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading">How To Dress For Your Deposition</h2>



<p>A deposition also generally occurs at one of the lawyers’ offices. Present are the attorneys, along with a court reporter and usually the parties involved in the case. One of the lawyers asks questions to a party or a witness, which can take several hours.</p>



<p>This proceeding is more formal than mediation, but usually feels less formal than court given that the deposition is not conducted in the courtroom. We recommend that our clients follow the guidelines we provide for court attire when preparing for a deposition.</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2022/06/21/how-do-i-dress-for-court/">How do I dress for court?</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
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		<title>Court affirms finding that court record insufficient for creation of binding agreement in DVO matter &#8212; Published Opinion from Ky. Court of Appeals</title>
		<link>https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2022/05/10/court-affirms-finding-that-court-record-insufficient-for-creation-of-binding-agreement-in-dvo-matter-published-opinion-from-ky-court-of-appeals/</link>
		
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		<pubDate>Tue, 10 May 2022 17:17:45 +0000</pubDate>
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		<category><![CDATA[Case Law - Kentucky]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[K. Spencer Pierson]]></category>
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					<description><![CDATA[<p>Waggoner v. Waggoner Jefferson Circuit Court Robert Waggoner filed a petition for a Domestic Violence Order (“DVO”) against his ex-wife, Christina, after a dispute at their former marital home occurred. An Emergency Protective Order (“EPO”) was entered and a DVO hearing was set. Preceding the hearing, counsel for both parties discussed a potential settlement agreement [&#8230;]</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2022/05/10/court-affirms-finding-that-court-record-insufficient-for-creation-of-binding-agreement-in-dvo-matter-published-opinion-from-ky-court-of-appeals/">Court affirms finding that court record insufficient for creation of binding agreement in DVO matter &#8212; Published Opinion from Ky. Court of Appeals</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
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<p><a href="http://opinions.kycourts.net/COA/2021-CA-001208.PDF" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Waggoner v. Waggoner</a></p>



<p>Jefferson Circuit Court</p>



<p>Robert Waggoner filed a petition for a Domestic Violence Order (“DVO”) against his ex-wife, Christina, after a dispute at their former marital home occurred. An Emergency Protective Order (“EPO”) was entered and a DVO hearing was set. Preceding the hearing, counsel for both parties discussed a potential settlement agreement that would allow all parties to access the marital home, dismiss the DVO petition, and set the matter for mediation. At the hearing, counsel made the court aware of these settlement discussions, and requested the matter be continued. The family court obliged, and recorded the following on the docket sheet:</p>



<blockquote class="wp-block-quote is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow"><p>“[P]ass 1 wk to 6-29-2021 @ 8:30 a.m. Mutual NUC [no unlawful contact] A.O. [agreed order] to be circulated b/w parties’ counsel/parties on divorce case to get [Christina] back in her house + to allow [Robert] to get tools . . . mediation to occur w/ Vish or Bowles.”</p></blockquote>



<p>At the next appearance of the parties, Robert’s attorney informed the family court that Robert had changed his mind about proceeding with the agreement, based around Christina’s recent emptying of the parties’ joint bank accounts. Again, the matter was passed, and at the next hearing, Robert explained that he had additional concerns about entering a settlement agreement and dismissing the DVO petition, as Christina had “threatened to kill [him] and burn down the house multiple times[.]” As a result, Robert refused to dismiss the petition. Christina filed a motion to dismiss the DVO and enforce the settlement agreement. The family ultimately denied her motion, explaining that the agreement was not expressly adopted by both attorneys and the record, and thereafter entered a DVO. Christina appealed.</p>



<p>The Court found no exchange on the record that would enforce a contractual agreement. The presentation to the family court by the parties was that the agreement was only ever “a work in progress” with exact terms never being read into the record and “conditional and contingent terms” being used when discussing the agreement. Likewise, while the family court wrote an aforementioned summary of the potential settlement, such writing was insufficient to create a binding agreement. Thus, the family court’s orders denying the motion to dismiss and granting the DVO were affirmed.</p>



<p>K. Spencer Pierson</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2022/05/10/court-affirms-finding-that-court-record-insufficient-for-creation-of-binding-agreement-in-dvo-matter-published-opinion-from-ky-court-of-appeals/">Court affirms finding that court record insufficient for creation of binding agreement in DVO matter &#8212; Published Opinion from Ky. Court of Appeals</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
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		<title>Mediation</title>
		<link>https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2020/09/08/mediation/</link>
		
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		<pubDate>Tue, 08 Sep 2020 14:17:44 +0000</pubDate>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/?p=10033</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<p>Mediation is the most common form of alternative dispute resolution (ADR) in Kentucky. In fact, many Judges in divorce and family law matters will require mediation before setting a final hearing or trial date. So, what is mediation? The American Bar Association describes mediation as “a private process where a neutral third person called a [&#8230;]</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2020/09/08/mediation/">Mediation</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
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<p>Mediation is the most common form of alternative dispute resolution (ADR) in Kentucky. In fact, many Judges in divorce and family law matters will require mediation before setting a final hearing or trial date. So, what is mediation?</p>



<p>The <a href="https://www.americanbar.org/groups/dispute_resolution/resources/DisputeResolutionProcesses/mediation/">American Bar Association</a> describes mediation as “a private process where a neutral third person called a mediator helps the parties discuss and try to resolve the dispute.” The court will either appoint the mediator, or your counsel will agree to utilize a certain mediator. The mediator is paid for services equally, in proportion to income, or at another division by agreement or Court Order. In many cases, counsel for both parties will work together to pinpoint a mediator best suited to resolve the issues in your case.</p>



<p>Once a mediator is selected and mediation has been scheduled, your attorney will need to meet with you ahead of time to explain the mediation process and develop a strategy. Mediators have different styles, and your attorney may discuss with you your mediator’s usual process. &nbsp;It is normal to be nervous before mediation and your attorney can walk you through the process, so you feel comfortable with what will occur.</p>



<p>The day of mediation, most mediators will start with an introduction including an explanation of the “rules of mediation.” The mediator will explain that the process is confidential and cannot be discussed in Court. The mediator might talk about the advantages of settling your case in mediation instead of proceeding to litigation. Ultimately, the mediator will familiarize themselves with your case and proceed accordingly.</p>



<p>At Diana L. Skaggs + Partners, PLLC we are well versed in utilizing meditation to settle cases to advance our client’s interest. Please visit our website to learn more.</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2020/09/08/mediation/">Mediation</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
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		<title>Mediated agreement set aside where wife&#8217;s lawyer left session and mediator gave advice, published opinion by Ky Court of Appeals</title>
		<link>https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2018/04/16/mediated-agreement-set-aside-where-wifes-lawyer-left-session-and-mediator-gave-advice-published-opinion-by-ky-court-of-appeals/</link>
		
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		<pubDate>Mon, 16 Apr 2018 19:50:51 +0000</pubDate>
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					<description><![CDATA[<p>Update: Opinion withdrawn BAAS V. BAAS Husband and Wife entered into a bullet-pointed informal mediated agreement. Wife signed based on the mediators representations that a tax credit Wife would receive in the agreement offset the difference in Wife’s valuation and Husband’s valuation of his businesses. When Husband’s attorney put together a formal agreement, Wife refused [&#8230;]</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2018/04/16/mediated-agreement-set-aside-where-wifes-lawyer-left-session-and-mediator-gave-advice-published-opinion-by-ky-court-of-appeals/">Mediated agreement set aside where wife&#8217;s lawyer left session and mediator gave advice, published opinion by Ky Court of Appeals</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
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										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Update: <a href="http://apps.courts.ky.gov/Appeals/COA_Dockets.shtm">Opinion withdrawn</a></p>
<p><a href="http://opinions.kycourts.net/coa/2016-CA-000725.pdf">BAAS V. BAAS</a></p>
<p>Husband and Wife entered into a bullet-pointed informal mediated agreement. Wife signed based on the mediators representations that a tax credit Wife would receive in the agreement offset the difference in Wife’s valuation and Husband’s valuation of his businesses. When Husband’s attorney put together a formal agreement, Wife refused to sign as “the mediator’s assurances regarding the value of the tax exemption were not accurate, and that the separation agreement addressed issues not previously discussed or agreed upon.” Husband motioned the Family Court to enforce the mediated agreement. After the hearing, the Family Court granted Husband’s motion and “ordered the mediated agreement incorporated by reference into the decree.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Wife appealed arguing the mediated agreement was unenforceable either because “the misconduct of her attorney rendered the result of mediation unconscionable” or because “her reliance on inaccurate material representations by the mediator limited her ability to assent to the terms of the agreement.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Court of Appeals starts by recognizing the well-settled contract rule that “absent fraud in the inducement, a written agreement duly executed by the party to be held, who had an opportunity to read it, will be enforced according to its terms,” going on to note the exception that “A reviewing court may set aside a settlement agreement if the agreement is manifestly unfair or unreasonable.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Looking to Wife’s argument about the absence of her counsel,even though the lawyer later returned, the Court of Appeals holds that the Mediator should have stopped the mediation when Wife’s attorney left. Just like a court proceeding, mediation is effectively over when Counsel is no longer present. The absence of Wife’s attorney rendered the contract unenforceable.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Next the Court of Appeals looks to the conduct of the Mediator holding that the “misconduct of the mediator prevented the parties from reaching a true and voluntary meeting of the minds.” The Court of Appeals is very concerned with the mediator’s conduct, especially the legal advice to Wife</p>
<p>regarding the value of the income tax exemption, ultimately holding: &#8220;… in quasi-judicial proceedings like court ordered mediation, the third party</p>
<p>neutral must observe and abide by the Kentucky Supreme Court Rules(“SCR”) regarding professional responsibility for lawyers (SCR 3.130 et seq.), the Kentucky Code of Judicial Conduct (SCR 4.300 et seq.), the applicable provisions of the Kentucky Rules of Civil Procedure (“CR”), and the Kentucky Family Court</p>
<p>Rules of Procedure and Practice (“FCRPP”).&#8221;</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Thus, as the mediator in this case violated the professional standards, Wife “lacked any real opportunity to effectively negotiate a bargain at all.” The Court of Appeals concludes that the Family Court’s order enforcing the agreement must be set-aside and reexamined in light of their ruling. While the bullet point agreement “satisfied KRS 403.180… the underlying process by which it was obtained was improper.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Digested by Elizabeth M. Howell</p>


<p></p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2018/04/16/mediated-agreement-set-aside-where-wifes-lawyer-left-session-and-mediator-gave-advice-published-opinion-by-ky-court-of-appeals/">Mediated agreement set aside where wife&#8217;s lawyer left session and mediator gave advice, published opinion by Ky Court of Appeals</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
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		<title>Prepare for your Divorce or Custody Mediation</title>
		<link>https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2014/07/02/prepare-for-your-divorce-or-custody-mediation/</link>
		
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		<pubDate>Wed, 02 Jul 2014 20:40:00 +0000</pubDate>
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		<category><![CDATA[Justin R. Key]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/?p=10545</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<p>Mediation is a common way for disputes to be resolved outside of family court. &#160;Most cases are ordered to mediation for no less than two (2) hours for the parties to a divorce or custody case to make a good faith attempt to resolve their issues before using court time and resources. Mediation provides more [&#8230;]</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2014/07/02/prepare-for-your-divorce-or-custody-mediation/">Prepare for your Divorce or Custody Mediation</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
]]></description>
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<p>Mediation is a common way for disputes to be resolved outside of family court. &nbsp;Most cases are ordered to mediation for no less than two (2) hours for the parties to a divorce or custody case to make a good faith attempt to resolve their issues before using court time and resources.</p>



<p>Mediation provides more flexibility than court in most instances and has many benefits, but you may want to be aware of the following information to help you prepare for your mediation session:</p>



<ul class="wp-block-list"><li>The mediator, usually a former judge or an experienced attorney, <strong>cannot force, make or require you to sign a settlement agreement.</strong> The mediator is a <strong>neutral person</strong> who assists parties in negotiations. The mediator cannot disclose any information to the Court other than whether a full or partial agreement was reached, and this is usually done by the filing of a simple report after the mediation.</li><li>If you and the other party reach an agreement on some or all issues, a written agreement will generally be prepared for your signature at the conclusion of the mediation session. <strong>If you sign an agreement at mediation, you will be bound to the terms.</strong> The Court will accept the agreement and will not allow either party to withdraw his/her consent or modify the terms of the agreement.  Typically, the mediated agreement will be entered by the Judge in your case as a <strong>Court Order</strong>. Failure to comply with the terms of such a Court Order, can warrant contempt sanctions against the party who fails to comply.</li><li>Depending on the issues in your case, a Court may be allowed to modify the mediated agreement in the future under certain circumstances, particularly in dealing with family law (divorce/custody) issues, e.g., child support, custody, visitation. Be sure to discuss with us prior to mediation, the types of issues which could be modified in the future and the legal requirements for modification. In addition, laws change over time and such changes may effectively modify your agreement. It is not possible however, to foresee the future and the changes which may occur. Thus, there is some prospective uncertainty to any agreement reached in the present.</li><li>During mediation, you may need advice from <strong>another professional</strong>, such as, a certified public accountant, tax preparer, mortgage broker or realtor. As an attorney, we cannot give you advice in other specialized fields. It may be prudent for you to <strong>contact one or more of these professionals, in advance,</strong> and arrange for a telephone conference, if necessary, during mediation.  Please contact us if you have any questions regarding this. If professional advice is necessary, but unavailable to you during mediation, you have the right to delay signing any agreement in order to obtain the required advice or information.</li><li>In order to be prepared for mediation, you should be well-rested and free from the influence of any mood or mind-altering medications.</li><li>Come prepared to compensate the mediator for his/her time in helping you negotiate your case. Usually the Court will order the parties to divide the <strong>expense of mediation</strong> equally or proportionally prior to mediation being scheduled.</li><li>Since mediation can be very stressful, do not plan to skip nourishment before or during mediation. Your <strong>decision-making ability depends on your physical and emotional well-being</strong>. Take appropriate steps to be as comfortable and at ease throughout the process as possible.</li><li>If you are responsible for the care of others, i.e., children or pets, <strong>make arrangements for their care in advance</strong> as mediation sessions may last longer than anticipated.</li><li>You are under <strong>no obligation</strong> to settle your case during mediation.  It is natural for each side to feel pressure during mediation as the mediator does his/her job.  If a mediated agreement is signed, it will be your decision. Neither the mediator, us or any third party can compel you to settle your case. Do not sign a settlement for any reason other than you want to do so.</li><li>If a mediated settlement is reached in whole or in part, you will generally be precluded from obtaining discovery or other information regarding the settled issues. Thus, if further information/documentation is desired by you on an issue, you are responsible raising this issue and discussing it fully with us <strong>prior to signing any agreement</strong>.</li></ul>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2014/07/02/prepare-for-your-divorce-or-custody-mediation/">Prepare for your Divorce or Custody Mediation</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
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		<title>ADULT &#038; YOUTH MEDIATORS CELEBRATE MEDIATION</title>
		<link>https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2008/11/17/adult-youth-mediators-celebrate-mediation/</link>
		
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		<pubDate>Mon, 17 Nov 2008 16:21:25 +0000</pubDate>
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					<description><![CDATA[<p>From the Louisville Bar Association: LOUISVILLE—As the number of juvenile delinquency and violence cases involving our cities&#8217; young people continues to grow, the Louisville Bar Association (LBA) is doing its part by helping to educate our youth by teaming up with JCPS and other local organizations to host the inaugural program A Meeting of the [&#8230;]</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2008/11/17/adult-youth-mediators-celebrate-mediation/">ADULT &#038; YOUTH MEDIATORS CELEBRATE MEDIATION</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
]]></description>
										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>From the Louisville Bar Association:<br />
<em>LOUISVILLE—As the number of juvenile delinquency and violence cases involving our cities&#8217; young people continues to grow, the Louisville Bar Association (LBA) is doing its part by helping to educate our youth by teaming up with JCPS and other local organizations to host the inaugural program A Meeting of the Minds on Tuesday, November 18.</p>
</p>
<p><span id="more-960"></span></p>
<p>From the Louisville Bar Association:<br />
<em>LOUISVILLE—As the number of juvenile delinquency and violence cases involving our cities&#8217; young people continues to grow, the Louisville Bar Association (LBA) is doing its part by helping to educate our youth by teaming up with JCPS and other local organizations to host the inaugural program A Meeting of the Minds on Tuesday, November 18.</p>
</p>
<p>The program, developed as a partnership between the LBA&#8217;s ADR/Mediation Section, Just Solutions and Peace Education Program, brings together adult and youth mediators to exchange information and ideas while celebrating and promoting peer mediation, a process that is affording elementary, middle and high school students the opportunity to learn new skills to deal with and resolve conflicts.</p>
</p>
<p>A Meeting of the Minds will involve 50 middle school students from Olmsted Academy North and Olmsted Academy South. These Jefferson County Public Schools were selected because their youth mediators conduct approximately 200 mediations annually and have made tremendous strides in reducing high levels of conflict within their respective schools. The selected students have completed peer mediation training and use the skills they have acquired to resolve disagreements in a peaceful, non-violent manner.</p>
</p>
<p>This program will be held in the Louisville Bar Center from 9:30 a.m. to noon and was made possible by a generous grant from the law firm Greenebaum Doll &#038; McDonald.</p>
</p>
<p>The program is being offered to the Olmsted North and South staff and their students free of charge.</p>
</p>
<p>For more information about A Meeting of the Minds, contact Cindy Robinson at (502) 583-5314 or via e-mail at crobinson@loubar.org.</p>
</p>
<p>About the Louisville Bar Association</p>
<p>The Louisville Bar Association is Kentucky’s oldest continuously operating bar association and is among the 40 largest local bars in the country with over 3,400 members and subscribers. The association’s mission is to promote justice, professional excellence and respect for the law, improve public access to the judicial system, provide law-related services to the community, and to serve its members.</em></p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2008/11/17/adult-youth-mediators-celebrate-mediation/">ADULT &#038; YOUTH MEDIATORS CELEBRATE MEDIATION</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
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		<title>Cooperative Or Collaborative Family Law &#8211; Which Is Better?</title>
		<link>https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2008/09/18/cooperative-or-collaborative-family-law-which-is-better/</link>
		
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		<pubDate>Thu, 18 Sep 2008 10:00:00 +0000</pubDate>
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					<description><![CDATA[<p>I am pleased to have the permission of Madison, Wisconsin attorney Linda Roberson of the firm Balisle &#38; Roberson to publish lock, stock and barrel her most thought provoking comparison of collaborative and cooperative family law. I am pleased to have the permission of Madison, Wisconsin attorney Linda Roberson of the firm Balisle &#38; Roberson [&#8230;]</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2008/09/18/cooperative-or-collaborative-family-law-which-is-better/">Cooperative Or Collaborative Family Law &#8211; Which Is Better?</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
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										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I am pleased to have the permission of Madison, Wisconsin attorney <a href="http://www.b-rlaw.com/wisconsin-family-law-divorce-attorneys-lindabalisle.html">Linda Roberson</a> of the firm<a href="http://www.b-rlaw.com/index.html"> Balisle &amp; Roberson</a> to publish lock, stock and barrel her most thought provoking comparison of collaborative and cooperative family law.</p>
<p><span id="more-949"></span></p>
<p>I am pleased to have the permission of Madison, Wisconsin attorney <a href="http://www.b-rlaw.com/wisconsin-family-law-divorce-attorneys-lindabalisle.html">Linda Roberson</a> of the firm<a href="http://www.b-rlaw.com/index.html"> Balisle &amp; Roberson</a> to publish lock, stock and barrel her most thought provoking comparison of collaborative and cooperative family law.</p>
<p>Collaborative Divorce or Cooperative Divorce?</p>
<blockquote><p><em>“Collaborative divorce” is the new buzz word in family law practice. Its proponents enthuse about better and less costly settlements, greater client satisfaction, fewer accounts receivable, and less stress in the practice of law, than they can achieve through a conventional approach to family law disputes. How realistic are these claims? What are the down sides of “collaborative divorce”? Does the concept of “collaborative divorce” present ethical pitfalls and possible malpractice minefields for the unwary practitioner?<br />
Lawyers who participate in the “collaborative divorce” movement use methods borrowed from more established alternative dispute resolution procedures to resolve family law disputes without litigation. However, unlike more accepted dispute resolution procedures, in “collaborative divorce” the lawyers and their clients agree that they will not engage in formal discovery, will voluntarily disclose information, and will settle the case without court intervention of any kind . They assume a duty to inform the attorney for the other party of errors they note in opposing counsel’s legal analysis or understanding of the facts. If they are unable to settle the case, both lawyers must withdraw from representing their respective clients and the estranged spouses must start over with new counsel.<br />
Good Lawyers Routinely Practice Cooperatively<br />
Even the most enthusiastic supporters of “collaborative divorce” concede that the concept of settling cases rather than litigating them is hardly novel. Capable family law practitioners have always directed their effort and creativity toward reaching agreement rather than duking it out in court. It isn’t news to anyone that litigation is expensive – sometimes prohibitively so – and that the most satisfactory settlements derive from skilled negotiation between capable counsel rather than a court-imposed resolution of disputed issues. How does the idea of “collaborative divorce” differ from what experienced practitioners do as a matter of course?<br />
Courtesy. The commitment of lawyers and parties to treat each other courteously is not a new one. Capable attorneys consistently endeavor to work cooperatively with opposing counsel to identify and value assets, set and meet scheduling deadlines, and otherwise facilitate resolution of the case. They respect legitimate positions taken by the other party and encourage their clients to be realistic and respectful as well. They are willing and able to compromise, and they are creative in crafting acceptable resolutions of disputed issues. “Collaborative divorce” supporters intimate that their process is unique because lawyers commit that they will not “threaten, insult, intimidate, or demonize” other participants in the divorce process. Good lawyers don’t do that now. The American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, which historically has provided a model for good practice nationally, has promulgated “Bounds of Advocacy” that set a high standard for professional courtesy and cooperation.<br />
Emotional cost. “Collaborative divorce” proponents say their process is designed for parties who don’t want to go to war and who don’t want “to hate each other for the rest of their lives.” This description fits the vast majority of family law clients, including most of those whose cases end up in court. Clients almost always care about the emotional cost of adversary proceedings, and about the impact of the divorce action on their children and other family members. To suggest that people who really care will give up the protections provided by court oversight is to do a vast disservice to most of our clients.<br />
Financial cost. “Collaborative divorce” supporters want to reduce the costs of the process by streamlining the discovery process. This also is not a new idea. Good lawyers have always sought to keep formal discovery to a minimum, to share costs of appraisals, to stipulate to values, and to cooperate in other ways to keep costs down. Many experienced practitioners routinely utilize mutually agreed upon short-form interrogatories, four-way meetings, joint telephone or in person conferences with experts, and other such collegial arrangements.<br />
As the above analysis indicates, the goals espoused by “collaborative divorce” lawyers do not differ in degree or in kind from the goal of the vast majority of the family law bar. Most lawyers try a cooperative approach first. Most lawyers agree – and most of their clients concur – that resolution of issues by settlement is preferable to litigation. And in most cases, lawyers and their clients resolve disputed issues by agreement and do not resort to the courts.<br />
The Limits of Collaboration<br />
Despite the most concerted efforts of capable counsel, we all know that not all cases settle, and those that do settle sometimes don’t settle easily. All of us have encountered the frustration of the last-minute, courthouse steps agreement, after completion of all the work and stress of trial preparation. Why is it that some cases don’t settle until the very last minute, and some cases don’t settle at all?<br />
Unsettled Legal Issues. Legitimate reasons to resort to litigation are not always evident at the beginning of a case. Much appellate work involves issues the existence of which – or at least the seriousness of which – did not surface until significant discovery and negotiation had occurred. Where the law is unsettled or where counsel genuinely disagree about the appropriate interpretation and application of the law to the facts of their case, it is not only reasonable but necessary to ask the judge to intervene. Cooperative counsel can reduce the complexity and expense of litigation by limiting contested issues, stipulating facts where possible, agreeing in advance to the admission of exhibits, declining to engage in delaying tactics, and other behavior that is both practical and considerate. Lawyers can commit themselves to conduct the proceedings without animosity and can counsel their clients to be courteous to the other side. But the court has the last word on interpreting and applying the law.<br />
Reality Testing. All clients say they want a “fair” result and many of them genuinely mean it. But they may have a very self-absorbed definition of “fair.” Many years ago Leonard Loeb, whose wisdom and example have greatly influenced the development of a civilized standard of practice for family law attorneys, pointed out an important truth: “Sometimes the hardest negotiation you have to engage in is the one with your own client.” A client who simply cannot see the broader picture despite counsel’s best efforts may require the reality therapy of a temporary order hearing, or a pretrial with the judge, or a deadline for responding to formal discovery, in order to be capable of backing down from an unreasonable stance so settlement negotiations can proceed.<br />
Scheduling Orders. We have all represented a left-behind spouse who does everything possible to avoid or at least delay the divorce, or a party who is preoccupied with business affairs or other family problems and just can’t get around to dealing with the work and decision-making implicit in the divorce process. If one party would prefer that the marriage continue, or if completing the action is not a priority, the court may need to facilitate progress in the case by issuing a scheduling order and setting deadlines. Counsel can cooperate by being reasonable and courteous in setting initial deadlines and in agreeing to extensions where necessary. The process need not be – and usually is not – antagonistic.<br />
Financial Disclosure. A client may, deliberately or inadvertently, fail to disclose assets without the rigorous attention to financial detail that formal discovery entails. Surely we have all had the experience of finding forgotten assets when a client produces the records necessary to back up his or her interrogatory answers. In other circumstances, the client and/or counsel may need the assurance of due diligence in discovery in order to be comfortable with a proposed settlement, especially where the estate is complex or the assets are substantial.<br />
Stability. Then there is the personal factor: divorce presents a significant life crisis for most of our clients, and we see them at their most vulnerable and most needy. The commencement of a divorce action is often accompanied by anxiety, guilt, an danger, and may throw a family into chaos. If one party’s antagonism toward the other is so overreaching that he or she is unable to proceed rationally and courteously, interim court orders may be the only way to achieve a level of stability that permits collaborative discussion of the long-term issues presented by the case.<br />
In each of the above situations, the legal system provides structure and finality, and often sets the stage for the ultimate negotiated resolution of the matter. Court processes, rather than being an impediment to settlement, often facilitate it.<br />
The Effectiveness of a “Collaborative Divorce” Approach<br />
Do “collaborative divorce” techniques provide an effective response to the above limitations? Unfortunately, they do not.<br />
Reality Testing. A client whose sense of “fair” is out of kilter with that of the other party and the lawyers will defeat the collaborative process, and both sides will have to incur the expense and delay of starting over with new counsel. Reality testing through a temporary order hearing or a pretrial with the judge is not an option in “collaborative divorce.” The lawyer representing a difficult client must either advocate for the client’s unreasonable position or take a public position adverse to the client’s view. An attorney cannot ethically make either of these choices, The first is at least arguably frivolous; the second violates the requirement that we advocate diligently for our clients. Proponents of “collaborative divorce” have not provided a solution to this ethical dilemma.<br />
Delay, Expense, and New Counsel. A client who wants to stall progress in a “collaborative divorce” can do so indefinitely, until the court threatens to dismiss the action and the party wishing to proceed must then retain new counsel to request a pretrial. Again, both sides incur the expense and delay of bringing a new attorney up to speed. The attorneys who know the facts and have established rapport with their clients cannot continue to be involved. How can this result benefit anyone?<br />
Diligence. Lack of due diligence in discovery may subject the attorney to a malpractice claim [see Helmbrecht v. St. Paul Ins. Co., 122 Wis.2d 94, 362 N.W. 2d 118 (1985)], may violate the ethical requirement of diligent representation, and may make the client uneasy about signing on the dotted line. In complex cases and cases in which there is a disparity in the spouses’ respective familiarity with or involvement in financial affairs, the security of formal discovery is not available to help resolve “collaborative divorces.”<br />
Timely and Efficient Court Intervention. If there is sufficient antagonism that experienced counsel are unable to negotiate an agreement, or if one party refuses to comply with an agreement, court intervention is necessary. Under the “collaborative divorce” approach, both lawyers must withdraw just at the time that an attorney who knows the case is most effective.<br />
Malpractice Issues<br />
In collaborative divorce, the parties and their respective lawyers sign a single contract, at least arguably creating obligations of each lawyer to the other attorney as well as to both clients. The collaborative law contract puts each lawyer in privity with both parties and with opposing counsel, creating a basis for contract claims to which an attorney is not exposed in standard practice. Moreover, the collaborative divorce contract assumes, though it does not specifically state, that each client completely waives his/her attorney’s obligations to maintain client confidentiality and not to inform the other party or lawyer of his/her legal, factual, or strategic errors. Yet, the contractual commitments required for “collaborative divorce” eliminate these obligations and substitute in their place obligations to disclose and to inform that are at least theoretically actionable either as contract claims or negligence (malpractice) claims.<br />
Assume that Attorneys A and B and their clients have agreed to proceed with a “collaborative divorce.” Attorney A makes a mistake that disadvantages client A and benefits client B. If Attorney B fails (deliberately or negligently) to correct the error, can client A sue Attorney B for malpractice? If Attorney B corrects the error, to his/her own client’s detriment, can Client B sue Attorney B for malpractice? Does the existence of a “collaborative divorce” contract provide a defense to malpractice? Does it increase malpractice exposure by permitting each party to sue both lawyers?<br />
If, unknown to Attorney A, Client A fails to provide full financial disclosure and thus disadvantages Client B, can Client B sue Attorney A for malpractice? Can Client B sue Attorney B for failing to take steps to discover the omission? Can Client A sue either or both of the attorneys for malpractice if the nondisclosure was inadvertent and would have been discovered through standard formal discovery, and if the effect of the error is that the judgment is vacated and litigated with new counsel with Client A held liable for Client B’s additional costs?<br />
If Attorney A fails to spot an issue that would likely be resolved in Client A’s favor, does Attorney B have a duty to raise the issue? If Attorney B fails to do so, can Client A sue Attorney B for malpractice? If Attorney B raises the issue, can Client B sue Attorney B for malpractice?<br />
Have you notified your insurance carrier? How will you pay for breach of contract litigation and possible judgments against you that your malpractice insurance does not cover?<br />
“Collaborative Divorce” May Increase the Cost of Divorce<br />
“Collaborative divorce” is marketed as a cost-saver for clients, but is it really? We all know that settlement is less costly than litigation. The issue is not whether “collaborative divorce” is less expensive than litigation, but whether it permits participants to spend less than they would if they employed more conventional settlement approaches. Most lawyers try informal discovery first and proceed to interrogatories or requests for document production or depositions only where informal attempts have failed or where the information provided is suspect. Most lawyers schedule contested trials only after repeated attempts to arrive at negotiated settlements. Most lawyers genuinely believe that better and more creative settlements can be achieved through negotiation and creative planning rather than through a court-imposed resolution. Virtually no good lawyer chooses litigation as the first and best option.<br />
In a conventional divorce, the lawyer who has worked up the case, who knows the client and the facts, and who understands the interpersonal dynamics of the case, can use this knowledge base to proceed if necessary to a litigated conclusion. In “collaborative divorce,” if negotiations fail the clients have to begin again with new counsel and pay a new lawyer to learn the complexities of the case. If the clients have a relatively simple financial situation, they probably can’t afford to pay twice. If they have a complex situation, the time and expense necessary to duplicate or recreate the financial analysis and valuations will likely be outrageously high. In some cases, clients may save some money, though there is no evidence that “collaborative divorce” is less costly or less time-consuming than any cooperative settlement approach. In other cases, however, overall costs will skyrocket, and the time it takes to complete the process will be significantly extended because of the duplication of effort entailed by substitution of counsel. And while “collaborative divorce” proponents suggest that its practitioners will have fewer uncollected accounts, one may reasonably question whether clients who are forced to change lawyers will fully pay both sets of counsel.<br />
Is “Collaborative Divorce” a Better Process?<br />
Advocates of “collaborative divorce” say that clients are motivated to learn problem-solving strategies because there are no “court threats.” In some cases that may be true. Experienced attorneys know, however, that with many clients it is precisely the ability to schedule court dates and set deadlines that provides the impetus for settlement. Cases often settle only when delay is no longer possible and the time for gamesmanship is over. We’ve all had the experience – probably on both sides – of dealing with a client or opposing party who stubbornly sticks to a position until trial is imminent. Clients who employ more efficient problem-solving strategies do so in most cases because they understand that they will get the best results that way, and a contested trial date need not be scheduled in order to negotiate a settlement. There are no “court threats” because they are able to resolve their differences without the looming specter of a contested divorce. Moreover, where the bargaining positions of the respective clients are unequal – one is more financially experienced, or more legally knowledgeable, or simply more intimidating – the reality of “what the judge will likely do if we go to court” may be crucial to a fair settlement.<br />
“Collaborative divorce” supporters also claim that clients are “more satisfied” with the results achieved with the collaborative approach. It’s not news that clients are more amenable to and more willing to comply with the terms of an agreed settlement than one that is court imposed. But what is the evidence that clients are “more satisfied” with a collaborative settlement than with a settlement reached through conventional cooperation and negotiation?<br />
“Collaborative divorce” proponents contend that the process offers a way to practice law that is “more positive, more challenging, more rewarding, and more fun” than conventional practice. This is simply not the case for those of us who have historically settled most of our cases creatively, without having to give up the option to litigate if negotiations break down, or to dodge ethical issues, or to assume additional malpractice exposure..<br />
Cooperative Divorce<br />
The attorneys who are spearheading the “collaborative divorce” movement have adopted this idea with the best of intentions. They are looking in good faith for a more humane and less stressful way to deal with the sturm und drang of marital dissolution. They are legitimately frustrated with the waste of time and duplication of effort that goes into simultaneous settlement negotiations and trial preparation. They want to make a hard time easier for their clients and for themselves.<br />
We can work toward these goals without running afoul of ethical rules, increasing malpractice exposure, and refusing to use the available resources of the court system appropriately to facilitate negotiated settlements wherever possible. Let’s call it “cooperative divorce.”<br />
The “cooperative divorce” practitioner would:<br />
Respect all parties and counsel and treat all participants courteously.<br />
Respond promptly and in a straight-forward way to requests – both formal and informal – for information. (No paper bags full of unsorted documents, receipts, and junk mail in response to a request for production of documents; if you need an extension of time, explain why and ask for it rather than leave the opposing attorney to guess when he or she will hear from you, etc.)<br />
Cooperate with rescheduling requests, requests for extensions, and the like as a matter of common courtesy. Everybody needs a break sometime.<br />
Tailor information requests to the information needed for each specific case, rather than sending blanket, form discovery documents or routinely scheduling depositions without a specific purpose.<br />
Educate his or her client about the other party’s rights and perspective, rather than simply supporting the client’s position regardless of its merits or the realities of the case.<br />
Encourage the client to take a broad view and consider relationship issues. Help the client focus on the issues that can be resolved within the legal system and discourage justification of the client’s bad behavior on the basis of the estranged spouse’s total lack of redeeming qualities.<br />
Prepare seriously for settlement negotiations; do the homework that is necessary to conclude the case. Run after-tax cash flow schedules and marital balance sheets; put together comprehensive parenting plans, update financial statements – as if the case were going to trial instead of a negotiation session. Too often we contribute to delays by being unprepared to negotiate effectively.<br />
Keep his or her word. If a cooperative lawyer commits to provide information or a document draft by a certain date, he or she does so or makes a courtesy call to explain an unavoidable delay. If a cooperative lawyer makes a proposal in negotiation, he or she does not renege on the proposal on the table and retreat to a more favorable position for his or her client.<br />
Use the legal system as a resource to help settle the case if appropriate.<br />
Understand the rich menu of alternative dispute resolution resources and recommend their use as appropriate.<br />
Maintain a civil and courteous approach. If litigation is necessary, stipulate where possible, cooperate with the admission of exhibits, accommodate the other side’s expert witnesses, and advocate for his or her client without becoming antagonistic.<br />
Most good lawyers do most of these things most of the time. But we all slip up on occasion. Committing to “cooperative divorce” avoids the problems of “collaborative divorce” and improves the practice of family law.<br />
Thanks to Gary Young, Allan Koritzinsky, Linda Balisle, and Margo Melli for their input and support of the “cooperative divorce” concept.<br />
This article provides general information only and is not intended as a substitute for legal advice. Nor does this article imply any attorney client relationship. This article is for informative purposes only and may not apply in your state, please consult an attorney in your area.</em></p></blockquote>
<p>Thanks, Linda. I hope your pearls of wisdom lead to cooperative panels of lawyers in Kentucky, as you have in Wisconsin. Many of us jumped on the collaborative family law bandwagon and some of us are starting to see and hear of some of the problems you mention.</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2008/09/18/cooperative-or-collaborative-family-law-which-is-better/">Cooperative Or Collaborative Family Law &#8211; Which Is Better?</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
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		<title>Raisor v. Raisor, Ky Mediated Settlement Agreement</title>
		<link>https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2008/01/24/raisor-v-raisor-ky-mediated-settlement-agreement/</link>
		
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		<pubDate>Thu, 24 Jan 2008 11:00:00 +0000</pubDate>
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					<description><![CDATA[<p>Raisor v. Raisor, ___S.W.3d___(Ky. App.)Ex-Wife appealed from TC’s order adopting the Separation and Property Settlement Agreement between Ex-Wife and Ex-Husband. The parties had reached a property settlement agreement at mediation, memorialized by the mediator&#8217;s handwritten notes, which was signed by the parties, their respective attorneys, and the mediator. Thereafter, Ex-Husband&#8217;s attorney tendered a formal settlement [&#8230;]</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2008/01/24/raisor-v-raisor-ky-mediated-settlement-agreement/">Raisor v. Raisor, Ky Mediated Settlement Agreement</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
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										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://opinions.kycourts.net/coa/2006-ca-001935.pdf">Raisor v. Raisor</a>, ___S.W.3d___(Ky. App.)Ex-Wife appealed from TC’s order adopting the Separation and Property Settlement Agreement between Ex-Wife and Ex-Husband.   The parties had reached a property settlement agreement at mediation, memorialized by the mediator&#8217;s handwritten notes, which was signed by the parties, their respective attorneys, and the mediator. Thereafter, Ex-Husband&#8217;s attorney tendered a formal settlement agreement incorporating the terms of settlement with the mediator’s handwritten notes attached.<br />
<span id="more-845"></span></p>
<p><a href="http://opinions.kycourts.net/coa/2006-ca-001935.pdf">Raisor v. Raisor</a>, ___S.W.3d___(Ky. App.)Ex-Wife appealed from TC’s order adopting the Separation and Property Settlement Agreement between Ex-Wife and Ex-Husband.   The parties had reached a property settlement agreement at mediation, memorialized by the mediator&#8217;s handwritten notes, which was signed by the parties, their respective attorneys, and the mediator. Thereafter, Ex-Husband&#8217;s attorney tendered a formal settlement agreement incorporating the terms of settlement with the mediator’s handwritten notes attached.  After Ex-Wife contested Ex-Husband&#8217;s version of the agreement, DRC concluded that the agreement tendered by Ex-Husband reflected the settlement reached by the parties during mediation and recommended that TC accept the agreement, to which Ex-Wife filed exceptions. TC accepted DRC&#8217;s recommendations and this appeal followed. </p>
<p>Because she did not make the argument to TC, CA rejected Ex-Wife’s argument that Ex-Husband&#8217;s tendered settlement agreement could not be proven as a true recitation of the agreed-upon terms because the handwritten mediation notes were ambiguous and did not constitute a “written separation agreement” as required by Kentucky Revised Statutes 403.180(1).  In fact, she had argued to TC that the handwritten notes should be accepted as the parties’ agreement. CA declared that Ex-Wife could not “feed one can of worms to the trial judge and another to the appellate court.”  CA also rejected Ex-Wife&#8217;s second argument, that TC’s review was inconclusive because the parties failed to submit financial disclosure statements required by the 53rd Judicial Circuit&#8217;s local rules, because this argument was also raised for the first time on appeal. TC affirmed.  </p>
<p>Digested by <a href="http://www.louisvilledivorce.com/dedicatedprofessionals/mapes/">Michelle Eisenmenger Mapes</a>, <a href="http://www.louisvilledivorce.com/aboutus/">Diana L. Skaggs + Associates</a></p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2008/01/24/raisor-v-raisor-ky-mediated-settlement-agreement/">Raisor v. Raisor, Ky Mediated Settlement Agreement</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
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		<title>One To Be Published Ky Family Law Case Today, Mediated Settlement Agreement</title>
		<link>https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2008/01/18/one-to-be-published-ky-family-law-case-today-mediated-settlement-agreement/</link>
		
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		<pubDate>Fri, 18 Jan 2008 19:54:36 +0000</pubDate>
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					<description><![CDATA[<p>A full digest will follow shortly, but here&#8217;s the short version: Raisor v. Raisor, Handwritten settlement outline signed at mediation was incorporated into formal MSA and approved by trial court. Affirmed. At trial court wife wanted outline approved but not MSA prepared by husband. On appeal she claimed outline ambiguous. One can’t “feed one can [&#8230;]</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2008/01/18/one-to-be-published-ky-family-law-case-today-mediated-settlement-agreement/">One To Be Published Ky Family Law Case Today, Mediated Settlement Agreement</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
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										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>A full digest will follow shortly, but here&#8217;s the short version: <a href="http://opinions.kycourts.net/coa/2006-ca-001935.pdf">Raisor v. Raisor</a>,   Handwritten settlement outline signed at mediation was incorporated into formal MSA and approved by trial court. Affirmed.  At trial court wife wanted outline approved but not MSA prepared by husband. On appeal she claimed outline ambiguous. One can’t “feed one can of worms to the trial judge and another to the appellate court.” </p>
<p><span id="more-848"></span></p>
<p>A full digest will follow shortly, but here&#8217;s the short version: <a href="http://opinions.kycourts.net/coa/2006-ca-001935.pdf">Raisor v. Raisor</a>,   Handwritten settlement outline signed at mediation was incorporated into formal MSA and approved by trial court. Affirmed.  At trial court wife wanted outline approved but not MSA prepared by husband. On appeal she claimed outline ambiguous. One can’t “feed one can of worms to the trial judge and another to the appellate court.” </p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2008/01/18/one-to-be-published-ky-family-law-case-today-mediated-settlement-agreement/">One To Be Published Ky Family Law Case Today, Mediated Settlement Agreement</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
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		<title>Solving Custody Disputes Outside The Legal Arena</title>
		<link>https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2007/12/12/solving-custody-disputes-outside-the-legal-arena/</link>
		
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		<pubDate>Wed, 12 Dec 2007 11:00:00 +0000</pubDate>
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					<description><![CDATA[<p>From Rachel Levy&#8217;s report in Expatica, some quotes: Three years ago, Dutch national Hans&#8217;s life was one of turmoil as he, his children and ex-wife living in Canada were entangled in a messy child custody wrangle. Following a tough international legal battle, he had won custody over his children and brought them back to the [&#8230;]</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2007/12/12/solving-custody-disputes-outside-the-legal-arena/">Solving Custody Disputes Outside The Legal Arena</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
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										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>From Rachel Levy&#8217;s <a href="http://www.expatica.com/actual/article.asp?subchannel_id=1&#038;story_id=46531">report </a>in <a href="http://www.expatica.com/actual/toc.asp?subchannel_id=1&#038;name=Netherlands+Home+Page">Expatica</a>, some quotes:<i></p>
<p>Three years ago, Dutch national Hans&#8217;s life was one of turmoil as he, his children and ex-wife living in Canada were entangled in a messy child custody wrangle. </p>
<p>Following a tough international legal battle, he had won custody over his children and brought them back to the Netherlands. </p>
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<p>From Rachel Levy&#8217;s <a href="http://www.expatica.com/actual/article.asp?subchannel_id=1&#038;story_id=46531">report </a>in <a href="http://www.expatica.com/actual/toc.asp?subchannel_id=1&#038;name=Netherlands+Home+Page">Expatica</a>, some quotes:<i></p>
<p>Three years ago, Dutch national Hans&#8217;s life was one of turmoil as he, his children and ex-wife living in Canada were entangled in a messy child custody wrangle. </p>
<p>Following a tough international legal battle, he had won custody over his children and brought them back to the Netherlands. </p>
<p>There he discovered they resented him for fighting their mother. Bringing them up alone was another factor he found himself unable to cope with. </p>
<p>Communication had all but broken down. But then he found a solution &#8211; mediation. </p>
<p>A conference of 50 professionals in Apeldoorn is now discussing this new approach &#8211; mediation instead of litigation &#8211; as a way of resolving serious cases like that faced by Hans. </p>
<p>&#8220;After beating my ex-wife in court in the 1980 Hague Convention procedures that helped me return the children to the Netherlands, I discovered I had won a legal battle but lost my family,&#8221; Hans told Deutsche Presse-Agentur dpa. </p>
<p>&#8220;Communication with my ex-wife had reached an absolute low following the legal proceedings. The children resented me for taking them out of their environment just when they finally felt settled in Canada. They also had a difficult time living without their mother.&#8221; </p>
<p>Their mother, working part-time, had always been the children&#8217;s primary caregiver. Now, Hans had to replace her while working full-time. It proved impossible. </p>
<p>Mediation resolved the problem. </p>
<p>&#8220;We negotiated a new settlement for more than eight months and drafted a parenting plan for custody and visitation. The two youngest children returned to their mother in Canada. Our eldest son stayed with me,&#8221; he said. </p>
<p>His story marks a change in the way professionals today deal with the 1980 Hague Convention on Child Abduction. </p>
<p>This agreement helps prevent abductions, but in the process throws parents into new legal proceedings. This does not contribute long- term parental cooperation. </p>
<p>&#8220;Particularly common law countries are known for creating maximum adversity between divorcing parents,&#8221; says Denise Carter, director of Reunite. </p>
<p>Reunite is a British non-governmental organisation that helps parents who deal with international abduction, travel or relocation. </p>
<p>Reunite was also present at the Apeldoorn conference, organised by the independent non-governmental Centre for International Child Abduction (IKO). </p>
<p>Contrary to many countries nowadays, the Dutch do not automatically offer mediation in Hague Convention proceedings. </p>
<p>&#8220;This is surprising, considering the strong Dutch mediation tradition,&#8221; says Eberhard Carl, a German liaison judge who deals with international legal proceedings and mediators. </p>
<p>&#8220;I always tell parents any mediated settlement will make them happier than a court ruling. With mediation people regain control over their lives,&#8221; he added. </p>
<p>International mediation works with two mediators: one for each of the parent&#8217;s gender and culture. </p>
<p>German attorney and mediator Christoph Paul says: &#8220;It is crucial that both parents feel recognised during mediation. And they need recognise their children&#8217;s binational identity.&#8221; </p>
<p>Judge Carl notes that in western Germany, &#8220;mothers looked after young children themselves. French mothers send their babies to daycare. So you often see a French father claiming his German wife &#8220;is isolating&#8221; their 2-year-old daughter by keeping her at home. </p>
<p>&#8220;Vice-versa, German mothers don&#8217;t understand why a French father involves his parents so much in family issues,&#8221; he added. </p>
<p>Paul notes the cultural aspects involved in such cases: &#8220;Family members play different roles in different cultures. That is why cross-cultural mediation requires mediators from both cultures.&#8221; </p>
<p>Whether mediation will be integrated in all 1980 Hague Convention proceedings, remains uncertain. </p>
<p>&#8220;Mediation can only be successful if both parties have an open mind and are willing to consider different, original, solutions,&#8221; Paul asserts. </p>
<p>&#8220;A pragmatic mind-set is key to conflict-resolution. It is however important to remember that pragmatism is primarily a feature of north-west European culture,&#8221; he added. </p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com/2007/12/12/solving-custody-disputes-outside-the-legal-arena/">Solving Custody Disputes Outside The Legal Arena</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.louisvilledivorce.com">Goldberg Simpson - Family Law Group</a>.</p>
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